Is it love or is it illness?

Sigmund Freud's Libidinal Cathexis

Differentiating between libidinal cathexis and love involves understanding the motivations, depth, and nature of the connection one experiences with another person. While libidinal cathexis tends to focus primarily on the sexual or erotic dimension, love involves a more profound emotional bond, care, and commitment.

Difference between love and libidinal cathexis

Love can involve libidinal cathexis, but it is not limited to it. While libidinal cathexis refers to the investment of psychic energy or libido into an object or person, love is a complex emotion that encompasses various aspects beyond sexual desires.

Love involves a deep affection, care, and attachment towards another person. It includes emotional intimacy, trust, companionship, and a sense of connection. Love can be expressed in various forms, such as romantic love, familial love, platonic love, or even love for one's hobbies or interests.

While libidinal cathexis can be present in romantic love, as sexual desire is often a part of romantic relationships, love extends beyond the sexual aspect. Love involves emotional and psychological bonds, whereas libidinal cathexis tends to focus primarily on the sexual or erotic dimension.

Love can also exist without a sexual component, as seen in close friendships or the love between family members. In these cases, libidinal cathexis may not play a central role. The investment of psychic energy in love goes beyond the sexual and encompasses a broader range of emotions, attachments, and experiences.

Differentiating between libidinal cathexis and love can be a nuanced task, as both concepts involve emotional and psychological investment. However, some distinguishing factors can help us understand their differences. Let's explore them further with examples:

Here are some examples of libidinal cathexis in adulthood:

a. Sexual Attraction: Feeling intense sexual desire and arousal towards someone based on their physical appearance or sexual appeal, without necessarily experiencing a deep emotional connection.

b. Objectification: Viewing someone primarily as an object of sexual desire rather than recognizing and valuing their unique personality, emotions, and humanity.

c. Infatuation: Experiencing an intense, short-lived passion or crush based primarily on physical or sexual attraction, without a substantial emotional connection or commitment.

Love: Love is a complex emotion encompassing a deep emotional and psychological connection, care, and affection towards another person. It extends beyond sexual desires and involves a more profound bond. Here are some examples of love in adulthood:

a. Emotional Intimacy: Feeling a deep emotional connection and intimacy with a partner, sharing vulnerabilities, supporting each other, and experiencing a strong sense of empathy and understanding.

b. Commitment and Sacrifice: Being willing to make sacrifices and commitments for the well-being and happiness of the loved one, prioritizing their needs and desires alongside your own.

c. Unconditional Support: Providing unwavering support, care, and encouragement to a loved one during challenging times, without expecting anything in return.

d. Emotional Security: Feeling safe, secure, and at ease in the presence of the loved one, trusting their intentions, and being able to express vulnerabilities and fears without fear of judgment or rejection.

e. Depth and Longevity: Love often deepens and matures over time, developing into a profound and enduring bond that withstands the tests of life's challenges.

It's important to note that libidinal cathexis and love are not mutually exclusive; they can coexist to varying degrees in different relationships. Love may include an element of libidinal cathexis, especially in romantic relationships, where sexual desire is a natural part of human connection. However, love encompasses a broader range of emotional, psychological, and relational aspects beyond mere sexual attraction or gratification.

A love story that highlights the difference between libidinal cathexis and love:

Once upon a time in a bustling city, there was a young woman named Emma and a young man named James. Emma was an aspiring artist, and James was a charismatic musician. They crossed paths at a local art exhibition, their eyes meeting across a crowded room.

For James, it was a classic case of libidinal cathexis. He was immediately captivated by Emma's physical beauty and artistic flair. He was drawn to her luscious red hair, radiant smile, and the sensual way she moved. James felt a strong sexual attraction towards Emma, fantasizing about passionate encounters and indulging in his desires. However, his interest in Emma was primarily driven by his own physical and erotic cravings.

Emma, on the other hand, experienced something deeper. She felt an undeniable connection to James beyond his external appearance. She was intrigued by his creative spirit, his warm and genuine personality, and the way he made her laugh. Emma's emotions extended beyond physical attraction; she genuinely cared for James and wanted to explore a meaningful relationship.

As they spent more time together, James's libidinal cathexis began to wane. He realized that there was much more to Emma than her physical beauty. He discovered her kind heart, her intelligence, and her unwavering support for his music career. James's feelings transformed from mere desire to genuine love. He felt a deep emotional bond with Emma, cherishing her presence in his life and valuing her as a person beyond her physical attributes.

Emma, too, experienced love in its truest form. She appreciated James's physical charm, but what truly enamored her was his vulnerability, his ability to listen and understand her on a profound level. She felt safe and secure in their relationship, knowing that James was committed to her emotional well-being and growth.

Their love grew stronger with each passing day. They celebrated each other's successes and comforted each other during challenging times. Emma and James supported one another's dreams and aspirations, nurturing a deep emotional intimacy that extended beyond their initial physical attraction.

In this love story, the distinction between libidinal cathexis and love becomes apparent. James initially experienced libidinal cathexis, driven by his sexual desires and physical attraction. However, as he got to know Emma on a deeper level, his feelings transformed into a genuine love that encompassed emotional intimacy, care, and support.

Emma, from the beginning, experienced a deeper connection that went beyond physicality. Her love for James was rooted in his character, personality, and the emotional connection they shared.

This story illustrates that love goes beyond the initial sparks of attraction. It is an intricate tapestry of emotional connection, trust, support, and genuine care for one another. While libidinal cathexis may be a starting point, love requires the cultivation of a deep and meaningful bond that transcends mere physical desire.